STEAL HOME

While listening to one of my sober pals speak at a meeting, I had a very strong vision at the end of her talk.

My friend shared her incredible life story. I had heard it before. I remember hearing her when I first got sober when she had a year of sobriety, which seemed like forever to me then. She talked about wanting to isolate, wanting to drink and check out. I mean she wanted to check out now at 12 years sober! She wasn’t talking about the past.

The thinking part of her disease of alcoholism was getting ready to pounce. All of her defenses were down and she was telling the truth about her not wanting to come to the meeting today and not wanting to be with us. She didn’t fit it, didn’t feel a part of—and she didn’t even care.

Then, she talked about what she had learned to do when she felt this way. To come to meetings and talk even if she didn’t want to. Her words were like a prayer to me. A reminder that there is a solution to our problems and that our thoughts don’t need to overwhelm. God was right there. I felt her relaxing into us as she neared the end of her chair and the obsession and fear falling away from her as she talked.

Then I had this vision:

We were all at a baseball game and my friend was running around the bases. She rounded third base, headed for home plate and slid in on her belly. Dirt flying. Tagging home base with her fingertips. We were all there cheering her on as the umpire called her “SAFE!” That image of the umpire squatting with wide stance and arms stretched out to his sides, palms down, all of us screaming loudly and with all the drama we could muster was such a powerful picture of our sobriety community. We are safe together.

The safe zone. Come and stay.

Steal home if you have to.

Hebrews 12:1
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.”

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JUST BE HELD

At the moment of surrender, we begin to hold the truth. What does that mean?
I think it means that the lie that we “need alcohol” no longer holds us. We start our journey away from dependence on the drug or alcohol to our independence.

In that surrendering to God of all of our addictions, we switch our dependence on alcohol or drugs to our dependence on God to carry us through and fill that hole inside. Believe it or not, when we depend on God, we are moving into independence—freedom from the bondage of addiction.

We don't have to hold it all together. We can let God do the holding us.

I love this song by, Casting Crowns, “Just Be Held”

Take a moment to read the lyrics and let them wash over you.

Just Be Held
Casting Crowns
Hold it all together
Everybody needs you strong
But life hits you out of nowhere
And barely leaves you holding on
And when you’re tired of fighting
Chained by your control
There’s freedom in surrender
Lay it down and let it go
So when you’re on your knees and answers seem so far away
You’re not alone, stop holding on and just be held
Your world’s not falling apart, it’s falling into place
I’m on the throne, stop holding on and just be held
Just be held, just be held
If your eyes are on the storm
You’ll wonder if I love you still
But if your eyes are on the cross
You’ll know I always have and I always will
And not a tear is wasted
In time, you’ll understand
I’m painting beauty with the ashes
Your life is in My hands

My favorite line is “And when you’re tired of fighting, chained by your control—
there’s freedom in surrender...”

Surrender. So powerful.
 
John 8:32
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

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SLIP OR RELAPSE?

I hear people say when they drink again, "I had a little SLIP."

You mean a relapse? A slip implies that drinking again was somehow an accident—that I had nothing to do with it.

NO.

Sobriety Losing It’s Priority.

That’s what a SLIP is right there. Sobriety losing its priority. The relapse begins long before I take that drink again. If I am not vigilant about my sobriety and make that my number one priority, I will start thinking old thoughts, repeating old behaviors, and I am right back where I was while drinking. Alcohol becomes my solution again. Relapse becomes a possibility. I start making excuses for my behavior.

The reason I know I have more recovery to do is because I am still alive.

Drinking is not an option for me anymore. Period.

Now I ask myself, “What am I doing for my sobriety today?”

Then, I pray and ask God to relieve me of the bondage of self—get out of my own head and stop thinking "I got this." Next I go help somebody in need or serve in some way. Sometimes that is just going to a meeting and sitting in the seat and being there for somebody else.

Retrain your brain. Be transformed by doing different behavior.

Try it. It works.

“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”  Psalm 139:23-24

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UNLOCK THE MYSTERY

“If I told you, I’d have to kill you.”

That line, originally, may as well have been a direct quote from God.

We don’t get to know what happens after this life, or if He is really there for us in this one for sure. Do we?

If we really knew how wonderful it was to be in heaven or with God, we may not want to be on this troubled Earth anymore, right? Everyone would be rushing to get to the good part.

OK, that’s the faith part, and—the hard part.

So I think we are supposed to sit with the mystery of it and just trust God. Lean not on our own understanding. That is where the real work in us happens. He did give us an option to communicate with him on a personal basis right now, today—

Prayer.

Our brains weren’t designed to hold all that God’s mind holds. He wants us to call on him, talk with him, and depend on Him.

That’s the whole point. Okay, I get it—

“Hi, God. It’s me.”

Proverbs 3:5
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight

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VICTIM OR VICTOR

Stuff happens. That doesn’t make me a victim.

I have failed but that doesn’t make me a failure.

I have suffered loss, but that doesn’t make me a loser.

We all have trials but they don’t have to define us. If we claim our trials, our story gives us an excuse to stay stuck. “this is why I am the way I am...” it becomes our excuse to stay that way. It's locked in place because we choose to believe that. If we name our enemy and tell the truth about it, we have half a chance at defeating it and triumphing over it into a new way of thinking. When we tell the truth about what happened in our past and get it out of our heads, we take all the power of its hold over us and we can begin to let it go.

Even though I don’t drink anymore, I say I am an alcoholic in recovery because it gives power to the recovery over it. I can help others by telling others what happened to me and identifying where I have come from, but it doesn’t continue to define me or keep me there.

I can claim my sobriety date as a defining moment when I step from victim (this happening to me) into victor—claiming victory over the obsession to drink and the thinking that controls that. It is up to me because God did give us the choice.

The victory lies in how we frame the circumstances. Old patterns you have in place get rearranged. If the circumstances don’t get rearranged, your thinking about them does. You will begin to look at everything with new eyeglasses. It's ok to ask for help. From somebody close to you, or from God.

Step into the light just by how you view yourself.

YOU are a victor.

See it. Believe it. Live it.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

2 Corinthians 12:9

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GO FORTH ON THE FIFTH

Recently I heard this from another fellow traveler on the recovery road:

Take a fifth with you on the 4th and you won’t go forth on the 5th.

Ha ha, I can actually physically hear the laughter from recovery people in response to this
tongue-twister. To those who don’t know anything about the twelve steps of recovery, I will give you some needed background on why this is funny.

STEP FOUR: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

In step FOUR, we get down to business and make friends with the truth.
We look deeply into our past including resentments, fears and shortcomings. It is about “owning” our transgressions. It’s about not holding back and finally seeing our part in any interaction we had or will have with others.We need to be thorough in this step in
writing everything down. Everything. Stuff we thought we would carry to our grave.

STEP FIVE: Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being
the exact nature of our wrongs.

In step FIVE, we release it all and it becomes the first tangible evidence of our recovery.

Honestly writing our 4th step and sharing with another human being (5th step), helps us let go of any guilt or upset we are carrying into the future with us. We learn that we are bigger than our mistakes. We now move forward, trusting ourselves once again.

Many have relapsed over these two steps because of the weight we put on it. We make it bigger than it is. We make it bigger than we need to. That's why that tongue-twister is funny.

When we train ourselves that this process of writing the truth, owning it and telling it to another human—lessens the bigness of it. We get to incorporate this behavior into our daily lives. We don’t have to relapse over this.

So—I suggest you go forth on your 5th(step) without the fifth. If I can do it, you can too.
I am forever changed because of it.

Get writing (4th Step)

Tell the truth (5th Step)

It works.

John 8:32
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

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